Wrestling with a good God

I do not have a beautiful story or heart-warming experience to share. During my time here, I have not heard a powerful revelation from God or been humbled with tears. I daily wrestle with God asking "Why am I here?" "Whats the point?" and saying "I'd rather be home working and hanging out with friends." I don't understand the three hour budget conversations, the difficult discussions on race that end with more questions than answers, or the late night talks on justice that result with no easy answers.

But I trust the Lord my God. He undoubtedly moved me to do Sidewalks. Perhaps not so I could have a spiritual growth spurt, but that I would learn to continually follow after Him. During my past semester at York College, my faith grew astronomically as I surrendered more of my life to Christ. God gave resolution to difficulties in my past and faithfully followed through with abundant provisions and better plans than I could have dreamed on my own.

I believe that my God is uniquely working in my life as well as the lives of others here at Sidewalks. In my case, it may be a time of gradual yet progressive growth in faith. In others it may be in more noticeable bold ways. Whichever stage you find yourself, know that God desires to have an intimate relationship with each and every one of us. He is faithful, has plans to prosper and not to harm, and personally works uniquely in every individual. How amazing that 16 people living in the same house, having the same discussions, and seeking after the same God will individually see Christ's love in different personal ways.

1 Chronicles 28:9- And Solomon, my son, learn to know the God of your ancestors intimately. Worship and serve him with your whole heart and a willing mind. For the Lord sees every heart and knows every plan and thought. If you seek him, you will find him. But if you forsake him he will reject you forever.